An Extra Banana

It was late one evening in Istanbul, and we were trying to buy a few breakfast items for the next morning.  We saw a small market run by an older Turkish gentleman.  When we stepped into his cozy store we could tell that he was prepared to ignore us.  We were just off the plane from Munich, excited to be in Turkey, and would not be denied a potential local interaction, so Steve greeted him with his best good evening in Turkish - “ee yee ahak sham lar”!  At first he looked startled and stared at us, then a grin appeared on his face.  A very welcome “Ee Yee Ahk Sham Lar” came back our way.  It was clear that he did not get many tourists in his shop who attempted to speak a few words in his language.  In the most friendly of gestures, he grabbed Steve by the arm and proudly gave us a tour of his beautiful assortment of fruit.  We pointed at a bunch of bananas, which he selected, weighed and bagged…smiling the whole time.  Before we could leave, he grabbed an extra banana and dropped it into the bag.  Breakfast was secure and a pleasant encounter was had during an otherwise mundane errand of buying bananas.

In Argentina practicing casual greetings in Spanish made our daily exercise regime more entertaining.  We found a great steep hill to climb in Salta to a magnificent view point of the valley.  It became our routine for a few days.  At first no one hiking in the opposite direction would pay any attention to us.  Steve started initiating greetings to our fellow hikers (more then boring ole buenos dias).  Oh boy, did the climb change.  We received smiles and gracious greetings in return.  All just over a few common words.
 
In every place we go we start a cheat sheet with about 5-10 basic expressions in the local language.  So far we have learned these phrases in a dozen or so languages. 

The first few days are always a memory test trying to remember and figure out how to pronounce the words.  We always bumble our way through it with anyone that will listen, and ask for guidance of how to pronounce the words correctly.  People are proud of their language and love to correct us.  By the time we are ready to leave a place, we can actually say them pretty well.  Will we remember them a year from now?  No.  But while on the road, it has given us many memories above and beyond 'the sights'. It has paid off handsomely in smiles, laughs, and sometimes…..an extra banana.

Difficult or Enriching?

As you can probably imagine, during our travels we’ve encountered all types of challenges.  There are the obvious ones that we knew we’d have to deal with:  various toilet configurations, questionable food and water, wardrobe limitations, uncomfortable pillows, dim lighting.   Then there are the ones we didn’t think about or even imagine.  Most of the time we laugh over these circumstances, other times we shout, cuss, roll our eyes or cry and then get over it.  The most unexpected hurdles make the best stories:

• Looking forward to watching mindless TV during our week stay in a rental apartment on the Dalmatian Coast.  It was advertised to be up to western standards and have satellite cable TV.  It has lots of channels all right…..all 300 of them are only in German! 
• Trying to cuddle in European double beds that are actually two twin mattresses pushed together.  Is the crack down the middle a birth control device?
• Washing clothes for a couple weeks only to find that the reason they smell and feel so nice is that the soap isn’t soap; it’s fabric softener - should we have double checked that Czech label?  It looked like detergent to us!
• From Croatia, buying tickets on line for the Munich Santana concert.  Why is the site only in German and what address do we use for receiving the tickets?
• Taking a shower in a stall that has no elbow room nor shower curtain.  How do you get clean when you can barely move or can‘t spray the water where it‘s needed most?
• Each one of our new “homes” has some design nuance to discover, usually painfully:  stubbing our toes on a threshold that sticks up ½ inch on either side of the door, or clunking our heads on light fixtures that are just a bit too low.
• Road signs that are “all Greek to us” only to find out what they mean after it’s too late: pedestrians only, official use only or Hey idiot, this street is closed, go back.  In one case we were actually told that we have 5 seconds to turn around and leave the area.  We sarcastically asked for 6.
• Super rubbery ice cube trays.  Who invented these useless things?
• An apartment that has the kitchen in the bathroom or is it the bathroom in the kitchen.  Either way it is G.R.O.S.S.  Cooking while sitting…..maybe it’s an idea that will catch on someday.
• People that take up the entire sidewalk and don’t move an inch when passing.  ARG!
• Hungarian hair stylists: selecting a hair color (by pointing and gesturing) only to find out it doesn’t look anything like the sample.  Since when is light brown, coal black?  And agreeing on the Number 2 shaver only to be almost scalped.  It’s hard to tell in the picture, but Amy’s hair is waaaay darker then any hair should be and Steve’s is so short he wonders if it’ll ever grow again.  Don’t we look over joyed with our new dos? 
• Keys and doors.  We’ve spent many frustrating moments locking and unlocking our homes including breaking and entering!  From huge medieval keys to digital codes to doormen to doors that can’t be opened even when unlocked.  This is Steve climbing into our own 2nd story apartment after walking blocks to borrow a ladder.  Who installs a door knob that doesn’t turn, even when unlocked?

Do these hurdles and challenges “enrich” our travel experience?  We actually believe that they do!  In the moment we may be frustrated or pissed, but so far, it’s the difficult times that are the most memorable and laughable.  Oh the stories we’ll be able to tell.

Sharpening our sales skills in South America

What?  Did that guy really put a set of pliers on my leg in the metro of Buenos Aires....fully packaged in plastic?  Or did that guy on the beach really think I was going to buy a neon pink biquini (spelled this way in Portugese).

Amy and I have each been selling professionally for some time now. We have seen a lot of ways of approaching a sales cycle.....but this?

Our first taste of this “New selling” approach was in the subway of Buenos Aires. It is common for a vendor to simply place his product of choice (whatever fell off the truck that week) on to the unsuspecting lap of the commuters. Everyone simply accepts the “gift” as he moves swiftly through the car between stops. Then as train begins to slow down, he picks it back up. If this is the day you simply could not live without that 3-pack of kleenex, or pair of scissors, or..... then you simply pay up. If you can live another day without this said product....you graciously offer it back to the vendor. Simple. Everyone understands. We were fascinated.

Anyone who has visited a beach in Mexico understands that you are the next prospect for the sand dwellers hawking their wares. These guys have nothing on the Sand Sales Gods of Rio! If you choose to walk the beaches of Copacabana or Ipanema (which I highly advise), you are a prospect! Take your pick......Tshirts, hats, sunglasses, hammocks, cold beer (YES!!!!!!!!!), watermelon, shrimp kabobs, assorted other food items, Futbols, biquinis, beach chairs, things with “Brasil” printed on them, and more. Make eye contact and you are a prospect. Stop for a minute to enjoy the view...you are a prospect. Bring out a camera.....be prepared for the entire population of Rio to try to sell you something. We counted – less than 30 seconds between each sales effort directed at us, and it NEVER ends. Yes.....these are the true sand gods of selling!

Mi Amigo....I have EVERYTHING you need. Well, you can probably guess where this one could go.

Children selling socks, religious artifacts, and looking way too cute. One came up and hugged us and wouldn't let go. As much as you want to give something to these sales Prince and Princesses, you are advised not to. Some adult is putting them up to it, and buying from them encourages continued bad behavior. Of course we couldn't resist all of them. What we found most interesting is the parents of the children are usually close by. One man followed up his child's attempt to sell us an extension chord (you read that correctly!) by offering us Coca leaves. Now that is a completely different story for another blog.....hint, hint.

Two Months, Two Scams

Shit Happens
What do you do when you have a 3 hour layover and the airport is across the street from a walking path and nice park along the river?  You go for a stroll.  At least that is what we did.  It was a beautiful late afternoon, the river was perfectly calm and celebration was in the air.  It was Argentina’s Bicentennial.  People were fishing, picnicking, relaxing.  Other waiting travelers were also enjoying a few minutes outside.  We were blissfully  strolling along under a tree lined path when splat, Amy is shat upon.  Immediately her attention turns to the yucky stuff on her arm and in her hair.  But wait, a nice lady is offering napkins and water to wipe it off.  We didn’t fall off the turnip truck yesterday, so we automatically go on alert.  Thank goodness for our instincts.  She sees globs of poo on Steve’s backpack and says  “Mister, mister” and tells him through mime to take his pack off and she offers more cleaning assistance.  As much as we would like another pair of hands to help us clean up, we thank and continue to distance ourselves from her.
The timing was just a bit too right and she was just a bit too nice and insistent for this to be legit.  After only a few steps away we turned back to look for her and she had disappeared.  It was an attempt to steal our stuff!  A scam!  On us!  The gaul!
After closer inspection, the bird poop wasn’t exactly bird poop, but some sort of muddy concoction.  It was all over both of us and probably came from the side or back of us, not from above.  After cleaning up, we got mad.  All we wanted was some fresh air and to stretch our bodies.  Leave us alone!  Don’t try to rip us off!  Get a real job!
We calmed down and speculated that somehow she used a squeeze bottle to simulate a bird defecting on us.  Nice try lady. 

Dirty Shoes
We’re walking along Ipanema Beach, it’s mid day, mid week and relatively quiet.  We’re just walking and talking and minding our own business when out from nowhere is a young man frantically offering to clean a mess on Steve’s shoe.  What?  How did a glob of gunk get on the top of my shoe?  It wasn’t there a few minutes ago.  He just happened to have a bucket of brushes and polish specifically for that type of gunk and loads of gumption.  He wouldn’t give up.  As we keep walking he’s bending down trying to wipe Steve’s shoe.  He continued this for an uncomfortable amount of time.  Luckily no in English sounds very similar to não in Portuguese and he finally gives up.  After awhile we looked back and saw him hunkering down behind a garbage can just off the sidewalk.  He had a perfect angle to toss gunk onto people’s shoes.  How many times did he practice this before hitting his targets? 
Unlike the bird poop lady who wanted to take our pack, this guy was offering a service; he wanted payment.  But a scam is a scam.  Nice try dude.
We read about distraction scams that involved spilled ice cream, squirted mustard and tossed jelly, but not bird shit and shoe gunk.  We might look like a couple of suckers from Oregon and Iowa but we know you want our money and we’re on to you!!!