Two Months, Two Scams

Shit Happens
What do you do when you have a 3 hour layover and the airport is across the street from a walking path and nice park along the river?  You go for a stroll.  At least that is what we did.  It was a beautiful late afternoon, the river was perfectly calm and celebration was in the air.  It was Argentina’s Bicentennial.  People were fishing, picnicking, relaxing.  Other waiting travelers were also enjoying a few minutes outside.  We were blissfully  strolling along under a tree lined path when splat, Amy is shat upon.  Immediately her attention turns to the yucky stuff on her arm and in her hair.  But wait, a nice lady is offering napkins and water to wipe it off.  We didn’t fall off the turnip truck yesterday, so we automatically go on alert.  Thank goodness for our instincts.  She sees globs of poo on Steve’s backpack and says  “Mister, mister” and tells him through mime to take his pack off and she offers more cleaning assistance.  As much as we would like another pair of hands to help us clean up, we thank and continue to distance ourselves from her.
The timing was just a bit too right and she was just a bit too nice and insistent for this to be legit.  After only a few steps away we turned back to look for her and she had disappeared.  It was an attempt to steal our stuff!  A scam!  On us!  The gaul!
After closer inspection, the bird poop wasn’t exactly bird poop, but some sort of muddy concoction.  It was all over both of us and probably came from the side or back of us, not from above.  After cleaning up, we got mad.  All we wanted was some fresh air and to stretch our bodies.  Leave us alone!  Don’t try to rip us off!  Get a real job!
We calmed down and speculated that somehow she used a squeeze bottle to simulate a bird defecting on us.  Nice try lady. 

Dirty Shoes
We’re walking along Ipanema Beach, it’s mid day, mid week and relatively quiet.  We’re just walking and talking and minding our own business when out from nowhere is a young man frantically offering to clean a mess on Steve’s shoe.  What?  How did a glob of gunk get on the top of my shoe?  It wasn’t there a few minutes ago.  He just happened to have a bucket of brushes and polish specifically for that type of gunk and loads of gumption.  He wouldn’t give up.  As we keep walking he’s bending down trying to wipe Steve’s shoe.  He continued this for an uncomfortable amount of time.  Luckily no in English sounds very similar to não in Portuguese and he finally gives up.  After awhile we looked back and saw him hunkering down behind a garbage can just off the sidewalk.  He had a perfect angle to toss gunk onto people’s shoes.  How many times did he practice this before hitting his targets? 
Unlike the bird poop lady who wanted to take our pack, this guy was offering a service; he wanted payment.  But a scam is a scam.  Nice try dude.
We read about distraction scams that involved spilled ice cream, squirted mustard and tossed jelly, but not bird shit and shoe gunk.  We might look like a couple of suckers from Oregon and Iowa but we know you want our money and we’re on to you!!!